A young woman who actually
told me she was 30-years old gets in the car obviously drunk.
“I drank a lot. But don’t
worry! I already threw up twice,” she admits as she slurs her words.
“Oh, um, please don’t throw
up in my car,” I said urgently not wanting the smell or the mess in my Camry.
The way I foresaw it: no more rides for the night and a ghastly odor that only
Fabreeze and carpet cleaner would remove.
“Oh, no, no, I wouldn’t do
that to you,” she says like we’re old chums.
I turned to look back at her
to assess just how drunk she must be and bet on whether her chummy response
really meant anything. She’s got her Smart Phone in hand and is plunking away
at it. She looks okay. So, I drive…
Pretty soon I hear her
belligerently cussing into the phone. I can’t (and won’t) share the nasty
language she used, but it was profane and harsh. She hangs up and groggily
declares, “That was my mother! Can you believe she blocked me? My own mother!”
I wanted so badly to say,
“Yes, I would block you too!” What I did say is, “If she blocked you she won’t
get that message.” (This information doesn’t deter her from calling her mother
three more times.)
Then … she plunks away and
makes yet another phone call. NOW she is yelling and carrying on into the phone
to an answering machine. And guess who this person is? You got it: HER FATHER.
Now she rants and raves to Dad … about her mother blocking her.
And that Friend-Os is but a
taste of the funny stories that will appear on the blog. Between the absurdity
of it and the offensiveness of it, I definitely had my eyebrows raised. Oh, and
she asked me to “drop her anywhere.” I declined not wanting to leave her
randomly on some street corner – turned out her apartment was over a mile up
the road. It’s a good thing I have better judgment than to listen to a drunken
woman.
